Beards Are Sexxi!  For xXRainbowAtDawnXx
by xXAlissaAmaranthXx
Summary: What happens when Students get drunk? This!     Rated for language and the icky mental picture you get when you picture Jushiro and Yammamoto together! YammaXFem!Jushiro


Request for xXRainbowAtDawnXx

First: Before y'all go 'eeeeeeeew old man love' read the setup. This is waaaaay back when Jushiro and shunsui were still yammamotos students. Also, because I can't write yaoi, and because no matter how hard I try I cannot and don't want to picture Yamma-jii gay, Jushiro is a girl. Kay? Jushiro and Shunsui will still be best friends, but younger, and Old Man Yama is not so... old. Yeah. He looks more like 40 instead of 60. Think of it like a college girl having the hots for her professor. Which is still gross, but less so y'know?

Beards are SEXXI! ~ A request for xXRainbowAtDawnXx

"No *hic* Shunsui! No *hic* more or I'll have the *hic* hangover of my life tomorrow!" Jushiro slurred. Shunsui just grinned and leaned forewards, tipping the sake bottle over his friends cup. Jushiro glared at the full cup in front of her, face slightly flushed and eyes bright from liquor. Shunsui was slightly less drunk, but still pretty badly off from an impending hangover standpoint.

Jushiro sighed before snatching the cup off the table, spilling at bit on her lap as she drank it like a shot. She was doing it as quickly as possible, knowing her friend would get it down her throat one way or another. She should have known better. Come back to his place for 'a drink or two'. Yeah a drink or twenty would be more accurate. Shunsui about busted a gut laughing. "Its sake Jushiro! Not tequila! You're supposed to savor it!" he managed as he refilled their cups again.

Jushiro shot him a wry glance before knocking back the next cup. "It lost it's flavor after the first 12."

Shunsui laughed again, "It's your own fault for not telling me! You're not leaving till I know who it is!" Jushiro rolled her eyes, "And getting me *hic* drunk out of my mind will help? How will you even know if I'm *hic* telling the truth if I'm drunk?"

Another refill. "Just tell me who the guy is and this will all be over, and you can go home with whatever brain cells I haven't killed."

Jushiro sighed again, "You won't like it. You'll *hic* think I'm nuts." Shunsui rolled his eyes, "C'mon Jushiro, if you can't trust me who can you trust?" Jushiro sighed and looked dead into Shunsui's slightly glazed eyes.

"Yammamoto-sensei."

Shunsui stared at her. He blinked. He stared some more, his mouth opening and closing like a petting zoo koi-fish. Jushiro turned pink and looked away, already regretting her decision to tell. She just reeeeally wanted some braincells left tomorrow. Shunsui seemed to regain the use of his mouth, sort of, "B-but, h-he..." Jushiro looked up, looking annoyed. "He what? I told you you'd think I'm nuts."

Shunsui shook his head, "It's not that, it's just, just..."

"Just WHAT?"

"HE HAS A BEARD!"

Jushiro blinked, thoroughly taken aback. Of all things he could have said was wrong with her crush on their sensei, it was the beard? "Um, So?" Shunsui cocked his head, looking at her like she was nuts, "It's like, two feet long!"

"SO?"

"ITS A BEARD!"

"SO?"

"GIRLS HATE BEARDS!"

"BEARDS ARE SEXY!" Jushiro yelled.

Shunsui fell over laughing, "Are you serious! Girls are supposed to hate beards! You always said-" the door slid open. And Shunsui shot up. "Sensei!" He squeaked out. Jushiro whipped around, falling drunkenly over in the process, "Woah..." she muttered, putting a hand to her forehead. Yammamoto stepped into the room, tall and imposing, at least to Jushiro, who was still looking up from the floor.

"Whats going on here? Its one in the morning and people are complaining of yelling and noise!" Yammamoto said. Shunsui chuckled nervously and jushiro looked sheepish. "Sorry *hic* Yammamoto *hic* sensei!" Jushiro hiccuped, "We didn't mean to be so *hic* loud." Yammamoto looked down at her and stared, "Have you two been drinking?"

Shunsui laughed nervously, "Heh heh, maybe?" Yammamoto glared at him, holding Shunsui's eyes until he started to squirm under the stare. "We'll discuss your punishments tomorrow." Yammamoto said finally, "For now, I think she needs to be taken home." Shunsui looked over at Jushiro, who was attempting and failing miserably at sitting up. She erupted into a fit of drunken giggles every time she fell over again. Shunsui turned red, "Yeah, that's probably a good idea..."

Yammamoto crossed the room to jushiro and grabbed her wrists, helping her up. She leaned into him heavily. "I'm dizzy sensei!" she complained. Shunsui could have sworn he saw Yammamoto blush for just a second, but no, his sensei would never do that... would he? But then they were gone and he couldn't be sure.

Jushiro sobered just a bit as she and her sensei stepped out of shunsui's rooms. The cool wind brushing her cheeks did her good, and her stern sensei's presence alone was enough to snap her into seriousness. Or, at least as serious as she could be 23 cups of sake under...

She suddenly realized how heavily she was leaning on him, and pulled away from him. He watched her carefully as she checked her balance. She weaved a bit, but she could walk alright. They set off for her rooms. Since they were both students of Yammamoto, Shunsui's and Jushiro's rooms were fairly close together, making their walk mercifully short. She could sense her sensei's annoyance and agitation, rolling off him in waves. She wanted this walk over with, so she could chug a pot of ungodly strong coffee, pop a couple painkillers, and crawl into her bed. Okay, she didn't really need all that, she could settle for just having her balance back. This was humiliating.

She gritted her teeth and did her best to make Yammamoto forget she was there. It seemed like he already had actually, he seemed preoccupied. Way to preoccupied for one in the morning actually. She couldn't help but wonder what is was, drunk as she was. "Sensei?" she asked tentatively, "Is something wrong? Aside from your drunken students waking you up i mean?" She thanked her lucky stars her hiccups had subsided.

Yammamoto looked at her. "The entire seireitei probably heard you you know." he said, "I know I did." Jushiro's eyes grew round and her face turned a shade of red never before seen. "Um, What exactly did you hear then?"

Yammamoto looked at her, serious as a heart attack, "So beards are... how did you put it... sexy?" Jushiro froze, her face deepened to a bright scarlet, and her heart just about stopped.

"U-uh I-I um..." words weren't working. She trailed off. Maybe he would suddenly get hit over the head by a falling anvil and forget everything he'd heard. Oh Kami she hoped that would happen... Did that make her a terrible person? She considered it. Nope, she was fine, there were times when people needed to get hit over the head with a falling anvil, and she was pretty sure this was one of those times...

"And who's beard were you talking about?" Yammamoto asked. Oh Kami, thought Jushiro, You know what? That anvil could drop on me right about now, I'd take it and be grateful... "Um... no one?" She tried. Oh wow, she kicked herself, real intelligent!

"No, I'm quite sure you were describing the beard in great detail, It sounded like a very nice beard in fact. I'd very much like to know who it belonged to." he said. Jushiro was floored. Was he playing with her? It sounded like...

"Oh you already know who's it is don't you?" she grumbled. Yammamoto smiled, "No I have no idea. You'll have to tell me who has this sexy beard you know so much about." Oh. My. Kami. He did know. And he was teasing her just so he could hear her say it. Who was this guy and what had he done with her strict and serious sensei?

Wait, She thought, Why would he want it to be him anyway? She put a hand to her forehead, how drunk was she? She must be dreaming, because she was pretty sure sake didn't make you hallucinate. Yep she was... dreaming! That had to be it! A grin stretched across her face and she silently thanked Kami. A dream about getting drunk and declaring herself to her sensei she could handle!

Yammamoto was looking at her strangely now, no doubt from the creepy grin she was sporting. "Jushiro?" he questioned, "Are you feeling alright?" Jushiro just smiled even wider. "Yep!" she chirped, "Never been better! You still want to know who has the sexy beard?" Yammamoto nodded warily.

"You!" Jushiro laughed, "You have the sexiest beard in the history of sexy beards!" And while he stood there slightly shocked, she grabbed the front of his shihakusho and pulled. Her lips met his. She felt him freeze, but refused to let go. She could feel him keep moving his arms in the strangest ways, as though he couldn't decide whether to pull her closer or push her away. She didn't care. This was her dream damnit! Still, she did need air, and to soon she pulled away laughing. She knew she was dreaming now! "This is a great dream!" she laughed, "I wonder what else I could get away with?" she thought a moment, "Need something crazy... I know! C'mon sensei!" she grabbed his wrist and attempted to drag him back the way they had come. He stood firm, looking at her as if she had gone mad.

"What are you doing?" Her sensei's normally calm and stern demeanor had been absolutely shattered. She looked back over her shoulder at him, "This is a dream right?" she giggled, "So we can be crazy! We're gonna go get sombreros and dance!" He blanched and she resumed her dragging.

"Dream." Yammamoto stated, "Dream. You think this is a..." he was laughing by the end. Jushiro stopped and looked at him. "Yes?" she said uncertainly. He sobered quickly and looked at her. "A dream hm? Well then, you won't mind if I do this."

And all of the sudden her back was against the wall and Yammamoto was kissing her. Really kissing her. Like, the man wasn't messing around. He had taken advantage of her gasp as she hit the wall, and every inch of her mouth was being explored without mercy. Jushiro was loving every second of it. Tentatively, she slid her arms around his neck, and one of his hand left her shoulder, snaking around her waist. This was a very good dream.

Eventually, he pulled away, but he still kept her pressed to the wall. He gave her a searching look, and she stared into his eyes. She really, really wanted him to kiss her again, but... he was quickly developing the look of one who knows he really, really shouldn't have done that.

He let her up and grabbed her wrist. The world blurred, and suddenly she was in front of her door. Yammamoto released her, and turned as if to thinking, Jushiro seized his wrist, "A-are you leaving?" she gasped. Her sensei looked at her. "You know this isn't a dream." he murmered. Jushiro opened her door and pulled him inside. "I know." she whispered.

The door swung shut behind them.


End file.
